Recall 9-1-1,
When I look into your eyes,
I wish to love more.
I’m trying to undress myself
To make my thought visible,
I’m trying to blind you to my sorrows,
I’m trying to figure out the darkness invisible
Between our unintended errors,
I’m trying to stay away from gossips
On the arch of ladys’ feet,
I’m trying to walk you across the hardships
above the eyebrow to feel great,
I’m trying to be the cell phone
You dial for an important date,
I’m trying to be the stone
You wield to skip across a lake.
Bluebell Books Short Story Slam Week 9
ABC Wednesday I is for I ‘m Trying
Haiku Heights Day 11: Free Style
Happy September, Happy Blogging!
This is a very deep piece, filled with longing. What excellent words you have written here.
ReplyDeleteI like it because it reminds me of being selfless but it inevitably also reminds me of my favorite selfish song: The Nicest thing - Kate Nash http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=41R1jN26b4I
ReplyDeleteTake care and keep smiling. <3
After reading this and all of your efforts that you are putting into trying to be for someone...My question is what are they putting into trying to be for you...hope it is mutual because that works for me.. ;)
ReplyDeleteRYN thank you.
i really enjoyed reading this. so much to feel!
ReplyDeleteHappy September to you too!
Daydreamertoo,
ReplyDeleteThe poem is only one piece of expressions, not related to real life.
every poem speaks one opinion or represents one voice, it is a literature, not necessarily writing to show my real standing or anything.
Thanks for caring.
simply fantastic.
ReplyDeleteloved it...
Wonderful! I loved it!
ReplyDeleteyou are many things!
ReplyDeleteAloha from Waikiki;
Comfort Spiral
> < } } ( ° >
In trying to be so many things...don't forget the beauty of being "you" lovely poem
ReplyDeleteExcellent haiku with an important truth.
ReplyDeleteI felt wonderfully positive and optimistic after reading this - without feeling anything is too easy either.
ReplyDeleteHopefully you will achieve all you aim for. Delightful.
ReplyDeleteNice sentiments expressed!! .... and even if you achieve a small part, it will be a battle half won
ReplyDeleteI like your wishes.. may it come true for you someday.
ReplyDeleteOn this fateful day, I pray for peace for everyone ~
Splendid piece with a sense of yearning, but still looking forward to a journey :) nice
ReplyDeletehttp://lynnaima.wordpress.com/2011/09/10/the-crepuscule/
Beautiful! Peace and love to you. I think we all want to be important to someone. We all want to be that 'cell phone.'
ReplyDeleteA beautiful poem. Very nice read.
ReplyDeletehttp://charleslmashburn.wordpress.com/2011/09/11/farmers-lament-2/
great one I really like this...
ReplyDeleteWell, I really love this poem. Have wee tears in my eyes after reading...and feeling it. It's a gem.
ReplyDeleteOh! This is absolutely beautiful. It is so giving. Thank you!
ReplyDeleteVery powerful writing. Liked it very much. Well done.
ReplyDeleteMelanie
Deep and expressive piece with a tenderness. I liked the haiku to start.
ReplyDeleteHere is my entry.
http://jackedwardspoetry.blogspot.com/2011/09/rose.html
What can I say except wow?! Great job. Blessings, Terri
ReplyDeleteWonderful closing image. I love the skipping stone.
ReplyDeleteWhat a thoughtful piece, esp. the line about undressing to make thoughts visible! Wow!
ReplyDeleteIt's refreshing that a post with a 9/11 title isn't necessarily about 9/11....from the stance of pop culture and ethnography, the one date affects veritable strangers...those with no ties to New York, the Pentagon, etc. I appreciate that it's weaved here into daily life and some sort of relationship.
ReplyDeleteI’ve always been intrigued with the many facets of a woman. I suspect an average female could put a princess cut diamond to shame. Thank you for exposing a few of them.
ReplyDeleteawesome composition...great choice! mine is up too...:)
ReplyDeleteOf course we'll forget, collectively, as the population ages. Remember Pearl Harbor. Remember the Maine. But we don't.
ReplyDeleteROG, ABC Wednesday team
Such a powerful piece of work and so well done the message here is so lovely and filled with your heart
ReplyDeletehttp://gatelesspassage.com/2011/08/27/the-island-breeze/
you expressed some lovely sentiments in this
ReplyDeleteBeautiful thoughts!
ReplyDeleteInspector Hector is my letter I. Hope you can drop by!
so sad... so profound... so beautiful
ReplyDeleteI don't know if this will make sense....I don't feel I can write a comment that justifies the beauty and sense of longing that I feel in this piece.
ReplyDeleteWonderful writing
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ReplyDelete