Sunday, September 25, 2011

No Mood for Phoenix (Haikus in Magpie Tales)


Deep inside the box
is aesthetic paradox,
fooling all of us.
.
The sky is crying,
Cosmic insignificance,
A myth is cooking.
.
At midnight picnic,
I chew on dark thoughts between
slow sips of wet rain.
.
Car tires have gone flat,
Sadness attacks like rattlesnakes,
No mood for phoenix.                                  


*****

                     

Haiku Heights  Day 25, Free style, Day 26,  Phoenix


63 comments:

  1. No mood but never mind, life is fun! Beautiful verse!

    Hank

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  2. Better with no emotion than feeling low.

    Nice take on the prompt!

    JJRod'z

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  3. Midnight picnic and rattlesnakes...good stuff...

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  4. At midnight picnic,
    I chew on dark thoughts between
    slow sips of wet rain....I so like this! Sometimes writes about the darkness are the best work..

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  5. Wow, I love the various images. I'm a sucker for haikus as well. Wonderful.

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  6. I am a fan of midnight picnics and this poem :)

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  7. some very interesting takes on the image

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  8. rain and flat tires.... it is an adventurous combo....

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  9. I love the third verse. Gorgeous!

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  10. I love the lines:
    "I chew on dark thoughts between
    "slow sips of wet rain"

    Kay, Alberta, Canada
    An Unfittie’s Guide to Adventurous Travel

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  11. I love haiku tales,
    with the way they twist and turn,
    to the end whimper.

    Good work!

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  12. Yeah, I'm not much in the mood for a phoenix either, but I'm going to slog my way through scribbling a haiku on that topic and see what I come up with. Yours is a fascinating tale!

    Seed-Feathers and Wayside Pool

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  13. Enjoyed your post...
    interesting form to read.
    Thank you.
    ☮ Siggi in Downeast Maine

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  14. >>"Sadness attacks like rattlesnakes" - wow!

    i like this darkly ethereal poem. :)

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  15. Yeah, I like the bit about slow sips of wet rain!

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  16. Enigmatic, as good poetry should be.

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  17. I chew on dark thoughts between
    slow sips of wet rain

    Love it !

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  18. Those abstract words speak to me with potent voice. Wow!

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  19. I am trying to get the hang of limericks but so hard for me, as most forms tend to be. Good job here, happy gooseberry day!!!

    http://lynnaima.wordpress.com/2011/09/25/karmic-disobedience/

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  20. Wonderful group of haikus. Very nice.
    http://charleslmashburn.wordpress.com/2011/09/25/one-she-beckons-me-come-2/

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  21. I appreciate the third stanza, how awesome of an imagery you painted, real cool!!! happy gooseberry day!!

    http://lynnaima.wordpress.com/2011/09/25/karmic-disobedience/

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  22. I'm intrigued when a myth is cooking. Love "midnight picnic"

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  23. Well, I like the line that talks of chewing dark thoughts..beautiful well done..

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  24. It's an amazing night. Very well done.

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  25. Love the images in these haiku, particularly: "I chew on dark thoughts between/ slow sips of wet rain" Nice stuff!

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  26. i chew on dark thoughts between sips of rain...that line is particularly evocative....

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  27. It's that aesthetic paradox that gets us every time. :) Lovely

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  28. interesting haiku

    I like chew on dark thought too

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  29. I too chew dark thoughts.

    Beautifully written...

    Here is mine:

    unhinged

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  30. Great job! Writing haiku is not an easy task, you rise to the challenge beautifully.

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  31. I had a flat tire the other day. cost me $140 to get it changed. Had to buy a new one. I was in no mood for anything then either!

    Great write, even better read, thank you :)

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  32. Beautifully done, each and every one!

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  33. Sadness attacks like rattlesnakes...

    Love that.

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  34. A lyrical and mysterious tale here; I enjoyed the read. :)

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  35. I chew on dark thoughts between
    slow sips of wet rain...

    Oh, I do like that! I do, I do, I do!

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  36. wet rain :) that is something to think about! love it!

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  37. Oh, I LOVE this! You, my friend, have a way with words.

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  38. I love the line "sadness attacks like rattlesnakes." Amazing how you were able to write one poem and incorporate all those prompts!

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  39. Beautiful haiku!
    I enjoyed the read!

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  40. Words and picture are very evocative...

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  41. "an asthetic paradox" such a simple and beautiful line that has so much meaning in todays world. lovely, simply lovely.

    if you have the time id like you to check out some of my poetry i think you would enjoy it.

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  42. Haiku's are not my forte, so I really appreciate them when done well, like these.

    Stuart
    Tale Spinning
    The Rain of Tears

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  43. "At midnight picnic,
    I chew on dark thoughts between
    slow sips of wet rain" Great verse...this was a nice piece.

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  44. Beautiful expressions...loved the combination standing out on their own.

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  45. I like the way you used words here.

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  46. Some very creative images and similes in this.

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  47. "I chew on dark thoughts between
    slow sips of wet rain."
    I've been there; recently as a matter of fact.
    rel

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  48. a myth is indeed cooking with a midnight picnic. chewing on dark thoughts between slow sips of rain? i love ballsy characters:)

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  49. from the sky cryin to slow sips... great write

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  50. Beautiful choice of words an imagery -well done Morning!

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  51. "I chew on dark thoughts between
    slow sips of wet rain." Oh yes, I relate to that!

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  52. Stafford copied the exact line I was going to copy here. It is a great line in a poem that certainly suits the image. Just excellent. :)

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